Signaling Unity
“Politeness and consideration for others is like investing pennies and getting dollars back.” Thomas Sowell
While heading out about 8 am on a recent Friday morning, I counted four instances, in just as many streets, where the driver directly in front of me did not indicate they were turning right or left. When it happened the first time, I chalked it up to the absence of their early morning caffeine. Yet by the next block when it happened again with a different vehicle and driver, I was not as generous with the excuse making. When prompted to watch for red cars, we can orient our attention and spot “red” everywhere. I began to do the same with turn signals and as I am inclined to do, created a correlation (admittedly a judgement) between drivers who use turn signals and those that don’t.
In the digital playground of scrolling and swiping, I think many have taken a cognitive slide into isolation. Looking at our phones rarely invites other humans; the action is for oneself, not others. Granted many would argue visiting social media IS about others. Hmmm, is absorbing thousands of images of known or unknown beings really an act of considering others? Let’s get back behind the wheel, shall we?
When a driver doesn’t use their turn signal, the message seems to be “I’m the only one I need to think about.” In Virginia Satir’s book PeopleMaking, the foundational communication therapist opens with this premise: “We cannot not communicate.” When a driver forgets, chooses or neglects to use their turn signal, they are communicating something. I suggest the increase in not signaling is directly related to the familiarity of living in isolation, not unity. I am not suggesting the absence of using a signal is combative, nor does it mean the driver is a monster requiring an eject button to be activated and send them soaring into the ethers. What if the absence of consideration is the consequence of years living in an isolating technical silo?
It is time to take a leap to unity. Hold doors open, smile at passersby, risk a “Hello” and yes, use your turn signal. To signal is to communicate “I see you as we are sharing the road and the world together and I want to let you know what I’m going to do next, which takes care of me and you; in unison.”